HOW THE PUN-OFF WORKS

(This year our cast is like bread thrown in the shallow end of the gene pool of human racehorses)

DR. Stan Kegel - ORANGE COUNTY, CALIFORNIA

Dr. Stan Kegel didn't invent the Kegel exercises, but he does
exercise his readers' laugh muscles while splitting their ribs and
their funnybones with his daily humerus e-mailings on punny and funny
subjects. Recently retired from medicine but never to retire from
mirth, our Stan is the Stan-dard by which...um, by whom all other pun-
docs are measured. Stan, who is returning for his 7th year as a Pun-
Off judge, was honored as Punster of the Year in 2000 by the
International Save the Pun Foundation and is a well-loved member of
the PUNY YahooGroup. Currently, Stan is finishing up work on a book
of musical groaners with fellow former Punster of the Year, Richard
Lederer.

You can get more of Stan's chokes and gags subscribe to "Groaners" by
going to <http://www.otherwhen.com/mailman/listinfo/groaners> Stan
recommends receiving the digest rather than individual mailings

For less jokes, join one or more of his other lists by sending a
blank email to the following addresses:
* "Puns of the Day": <puns-of-the-day-subscribe@yahoogroups.com>
(Includes "Jest for Kids" & "Humerus News")
* "Jest For Kids": <jest4kids-subscribe@yahoogroups.com> (for
children 6 to 14)
* "Humerus News": <punsinthenews-subscribe@yahoogroups.com>

Sage advice (with a little thyme and parsley mixed in) warns, "Judge not, lest ye be judged." But Cynthia MacGregor has already been judged (and found wanton) some six previous years, so she decided it was her turn to pass judgment. (Judgment: She gave him a 7 but I know the judge meant 10.) Hailing (and sleeting and snowing) from Florida, Cyn flies to Austin annually to participate in the Pun-Off and once took second place in the HL&LP event. Cynthia is also being honored as the I.S.T.P.F's 2005 Punster of the Year (P.O.T.Y) In her "real life" Cyn is a bookieer, we mean authorwith 52 published books to her credit and more on the way. Her Website (it's a site for sore eyes) is www.cynthiamacgregor.com.

Aralyn Hughes grew up in Oklahoma, getting her kicks on Route 66. She has sold real estate in the Austin area since 1979 and is recognized by many as the broker with the pet pig, the hot pink pig-inspired "art car." Her outrageously colorful Clarksville home has been featured on the Discovery Channel, HGTV and local news stations. Drivers along Austin's MoPac highway are regularly entertained by her unique displays of yard art. To round out her "keepin' it weird" personality, this two-legged fiesta also paints, acts, (most recently in the Zachary Scott Theatre production of "Keepin' It Weird" and "In The West2") travels the world, dances tango, and plays African drums. Her zany costumes & hair dyes alone should qualify her to sit on our judge panel. If she doesn't find us too dis-tressing, this could become the highlight of her color-fool career. Read more about her at www.aralyn.com

Bob Branson - AUSTIN, TX

Bob Branson, on-air local host during KUT 90.5's afternoon drive time NPR programming, received his BA in Radio, TV & Films from the University of Kentucky long enough ago that radio waves were still made of stone and traveled quite slowly, allowing him to finish his shift on the university radio station and arrive home in time to actually hear his own program. After a few years in radio news he joined the federal government. He retired ten years ago as a public relations person for the Internal Revenue Servicean agency that certainly needs no PR since everyone already loves them. Bob feels his 30 years of working for the government makes him particularly prepared to judge a contest where words may or may not mean what they say.

The following text is over-excerpted from the letter sent to orient all of our PUN-OFF judges.

It is offered here to allow everyone some idea of how the judges might score the rankness of each entrant in P.O.S.

As Pun-Off contestants sign in at the event they will be asked to sign a form

stating that they have read and understand the rules. Your signature on this

document will also constitute your consent to have your image and voice recorded

for possible broadcast or display on the internet. Signing this form does not

assign or diminish your own copyright to your words or writings.



Even if you've read them before, please review the rules below as they appear on

the registration site. 



================================

29th Annual O.Henry Pun-Off

World Championships



MAY 20, 2006 - Noon - 5pm 

O.HENRY MUSEUM

BRUSH SQUARE

409 E.5TH STREET

AUSTIN, TEXAS

29th ANNUAL O.HENRY PUN OFF WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS - OFFICIAL RULES OF COMPETITION 



1. REGISTRATION: The O. Henry Pun-Off World Championships are divided into two

contests: Punniest of Show, and High Lies and Low Puns. Pre-registration is

required for both events. Contestants may enter either or both contests. A

maximum of thirty-two (32) entrants per event will be accepted for registration.

You must submit this form prior to May 12, 2006. Pre-registrations by phone may

be done at the discretion of the museum staff. On-line registration is now

available at http://application.microassist.net/punoff. On the day of the

competition contestants must sign in and pick up their registration packet at

Pun-Off site between 10:00 a.m. - 12:00 p.m. Packets not picked up by 12 p.m.

may be assigned to the names on the contestant waiting list. Contestants unable

to meet this requirement must contact the event organizers and make other

arrangements prior to 12:00 p.m. on the day of the competition. 



2. PUNNIEST OF SHOW: Each entered contestant will be allowed to present a pun on

stage. Puns may be presented in any format (e.g., visual, musical, stand-up

routine, etc.), and will be scored on a scale of one (1) to ten (10) by a panel

of judges. A contestant's score will be determined by adding the judges' scores

together. If a judge displays a score higher than 10 or lower than 1, that score

will be lowered or raised to the nearest allowable score (i.e., an 11 becomes a

10, a 0 becomes a 1, etc.). Contestants will be judged on content, originality,

and general effect of the presentation, including judges' interpretation of

audience response. Contestants may use notes or scripts, but should keep in mind

that the judges may take this into consideration when determining their score.

Contestants should endeavor to keep their routines under ninety (90) seconds in

length. Each routine will be timed by an independent timekeeper, who will allow

for audience response and other technical difficulties when determining if 90

seconds have passed. At the end of 90 seconds the timekeeper will sound a

signal, indicating that the contestant's 90 seconds has expired and a thirty

(30) second grace period is now in effect. At the end of this grace period

(i.e., after two (2) minutes' total time), the timekeeper will sound a second

signal, and the contestant will be asked to leave the stage. Although the judges

may still give a score for the routine, any contestant whose presentation is in

excess of 2 minutes' total time is automatically disqualified. The Master(s) of

Ceremonies will make the final determination of elapsed time based on the

timekeeper's signals. In the event of an incorrect or inadvertent signal from

the timekeeper, the Master(s) of Ceremonies will, as they deem necessary, adjust

the contestant's remaining time. The contestant with the highest total score

will win the event. In the case of a tie score, the tied contestants will be

called back on stage, where they will present part of their routine again. After

all tied contestants finish, audience response will be taken. The contestant

that receives the best audience reaction, as determined by the judging panel and

the Master(s) of Ceremonies, shall win the event. 



3. HIGH LIES & LOW PUNS: This competition will consist of no more than four

rounds of single-elimination heats. For each preliminary round, two contestants

at a time will be called onto the stage (a pairing), at which point they will be

given a topic drawn at random. The contestant with the lowest entry number will

have five (5) seconds to deliver a pun on this topic. The other contestant then

has five seconds to respond with another pun on the same topic. Contestants who

exceed the allotted five seconds will be eliminated from the competition. The

survivor of each pairing advances to the next round. Each preliminary round will

result in the elimination of one contestant. There will be no time limits in any

rounds. Puns may not be made on the same word within the same context during a

topic. A contestant who violates this rule will receive a "strike" and will be

given another five seconds to come up with a valid pun that has not been used

during the pairing. During the course of a pairing each contestant will be

allowed a cumulative total of 3 strikes before being disqualified and

eliminated. Automatic strikes will be awarded only for puns made on repeated

words. At the discretion of the emcee, strikes may also be awarded for non-puns

made on qualifying words or actual puns made on non-qualified words unless an

acceptable "repair"is offered. An unsatisfactory "repair" may be considered a

"non-response" and may result in instant elimination. A cumulative total of

three "strikes" against either contestant immediately ends the round. Once each

preliminary round pairing has begun, the drawn topic will not be changed. The

Master(s) of Ceremonies reserves the right to change, define or narrow the topic

or draw a new topic before starting any round of play. Time will be kept by an

independent timekeeper, who will allow for audience response and other technical

difficulties when determining if five seconds have passed. The Master(s) of

Ceremonies will make the final determination of elapsed time based on the

timekeeper's reports. In the event of an incorrect or inadvertent signal from

the timekeeper, the Master(s) of Ceremonies will, as they deem necessary, adjust

the contestant's remaining time. The final round will consist of no more than

five (5) people on stage, subject to the same rules as shown above. When only

two finalists are left, a new topic will be drawn and the round will resume. The

survivor of this final pairing will be declared the winner of High Lies and Low

Puns.



4. CONTESTANT NUMBERS AND ORDER OF APPEARANCE: Contestants will receive a

randomly selected number for each event entered. If a contestant enters both

events, the contestant will receive two numbers. These numbers will determine

the contestant's order of appearance in each contest. Contestants will not be

allowed to trade or exchange numbers drawn for either event unless cleared to do

so by the Master(s) of Ceremonies. Contestants in the Punniest of Show

competition will appear in numerical order, starting at one (1) and ending at

thirty-two (32). If less than 32 people enter Punniest of Show, non-selected

entry numbers will be skipped and the contestants will be called to the stage in

as close to numerical order as possible. Contestants entering High Lies and Low

Puns will be paired against each other according to the numbers they draw during

registration for the High Lies and Low Puns event. If the maximum of 32 entrants

has not been reached at the end of registration, each contestant will be paired

up against the contestant whose entry number is numerically closest. If a

contestant leaves the contest before their number is drawn for either event,

and/or does not respond when their number is called, their number will be

skipped and the contestant will be disqualified from further competition in that

event for the day. If, for any reason, there are an odd number of entrants

competing in the first round of High Lies and Low Puns, the remaining unpaired

contestant holding the highest number will be given a bye to the next round and

will be paired against the contestant with the lowest number who survived the

previous round. After the first round, any other odd numbered contestant will be

matched up in a 3-way elimination at the end of each round. 



5. FINAL AUTHORITY: The Master(s) of Ceremonies shall not overrule or change the

positions determined by the judges' scores in the Punniest of Show competition

(except in matters of an exceeded time limit and/or audience response), but will

have final authority over all other phases of registration and of both contests,

including the interpretation and implementation of these rules. 



6. RESPONSIBILITY: No employee of the O. Henry Home and Museum or the City of

Austin, nor any member of, or anyone officially associated with the Friends of

the O. Henry Museum or Punsters United Nearly Yearly (P.U.N.Y.), shall be held

responsible or liable in any way for the final outcome of either contest or for

any other matter regarding the competition as a whole or in part.



(SIGN HERE) 



I have read and understand the rules and agree to abide by them for the pupose

of competing in the 29th Annual O. Henry Pun-Off World Championships. I also

understand the the competitions shall be recorded for possible broadcast on TV

or other electronic media. I hereby Release the City of Austin, The O. Henry

Home and Museum, P.U.N.Y., the Friends of the O. Henry Museum and the producers

of any photographic images from any liability and/or claim involving the use,

broadcast or distribution of my image in any electronic or print media.